Baby Bird Flies The Nest
by IseultLaBelle
Summary: Ange reads Chloe a bedtime story on her final night at home before moving away to medical school, and questions if she's made the right decision. Two parter.
1. Chapter 1

**There's a bit of a backstory to this one. A few weeks ago, my friend and I came up with a plot for a children's book called Baby Bird Flies The Nest after watching that week's Holby City episode, starring Chloe as Baby Bird, Ange as Mummy Bird, Evan as Killer Cat, Nicky as Hedgehog, Cam as Fox and Fletch as Peacock. I was then planning a scene for my other Holby fanfic that ultimately I decided not to include, and so I've ended up putting the two together. I haven't written part two yet, but if you would like the final part of this story, (and the ending of Baby Bird!), do let me know and I'll write it up for you! **

**For full disclosure- my friend and I spent far too long researching various Scottish bird species, but we settled on robins in the end. We are, however, imagining Mummy and Baby Bird in matching tartan coats, dog coat style, just to complete the mental image! **

**Reviews are always welcome- I know I've totally lost my mind, but this was so much fun to write. **

**-IseultLaBelle x**

**Aberdeen, August 1992**

"So, once upon a time, Mummy Bird and Baby Bird lived in a nest, deep in the branches of the tallest tree in the forest."

"Robin."

"Yep, that's right, they look like robins, don't they? And you're got your robin, haven't you? So, are you going to be my helper? Yeah? Okay. Every morning, Mummy Bird left the nest and flew high, high, into the sky, as high as her wings would carry her. Are you going to make her fly?"

"Ba Bud," says Chloe, shakes her head firmly.

"Oh, you're doing Baby Bird today?" Ange realises.

"Ba Bud, Mummy."

"Okay. Baby Bird watched her from the nest, because Mummy Bird said she was too little to fly. Sometimes, Baby Bird peered over the edge of the nest and looked down at the world outside. But she didn't do this very often, because it was a long, long way down, and Baby Bird was scared that if she looked for too long, she would tumble all the way down to the ground."

Chloe wriggles on her mother's lap, waves her toy robin around haphazardly.

They're curled up together in the small double bed they've been sharing since Chloe started attempting to climb out of her cot several months ago, no room in Ange's mother's small two-bed terraced for her to sleep anywhere else. It's the last time, Ange reminds herself, the last time she's going to have to share her bed with a wriggly two-year-old for two weeks, and then another two weeks after that, at least, depending on how Chloe reacts to being separated from her long-term.

And she's been looking forward to it more than anything up until tonight. Finally, she won't have to creep back into her own bedroom in the dark trying to avoid waking Chloe up, won't be woken up in the middle of the night with Chloe babbling about monsters under the bed, Chloe stealing the duvet, Chloe gluing herself to her side when she's trying to sleep, pressing her cold feet up against her at 3am.

Tonight, though, Ange isn't quite so sure she's looking forward to this at all.

"Yep, Baby Bird's peering over the edge of her nest, isn't she? Good girl. So she waited, and waited, until Mummy Bird flew back down into the nest with plenty of worms for Baby Bird to eat. 'One day,' Mummy Bird told Baby Bird, 'when you're ready, you can fly with me all the way over the forest, and see the river, and the flowers, and all the forest creatures.'"

"Kee-uh Cat."

"Yes, that's right, but we haven't quite got to that part yet. We need to work on those tricky Ls in the middle of words, don't we? Chloe, can you say 'killer cat?'"

"Kiruh Cat."

"And what's your name?"

Chloe drops the toy robin onto the duvet beside her, makes her best concentration face. "Ko-ee."

"Close enough. Anyway. Mummy Bird had told Baby Bird all about the other animals who lived in the forest. There were the badgers who lived under the ground, and the owls who slept all day and flew through the sky at night. There were the foxes with their long, bushy tails, and the hedgehog with her prickly coat, and the peacock, with his feathery crown. Baby Bird knew that Mummy Bird liked Peacock a lot."

"Egg."

"Yep, it's time to turn the page, isn't it? So we can see the next picture. You do that for me then. Chloe, can you say 'page?'"

"Egg."

"Page."

"Peg."

"Good girl."

She won't be here for Chloe's first day at preschool, Ange ponders absentmindedly. She'll be gone, moved away, drowning in lecture notes and medical textbooks by then. And her daughter will be in safe hands with her own mother, of course she will be. But all the same, she'd feel an awful lot better if she was there that first day, could warn the preschool staff herself about Chloe's terrible speech, and her lactose intolerance, and her clinginess, and her ability to befriend every dog in the local park if left unsupervised for a matter of seconds.

"Kih-ruh Cat," says Chloe triumphantly, points to the illustration over the page.

"Killer Cat."

"Kih-ruh… luh Cat."

"You're so clever. 'But,' Mummy Bird often told Baby Bird, 'when you leave the nest, you must always remember that not all the animals in the forest are our friends. There's a Killer Cat who visits when no one is looking, and he loves to eat baby birds for his lunch.' Baby Bird thought the world outside her nest must be a very scary place. And so she stayed curled up inside when Mummy Bird flew away to find them worms to eat, and dreamt about the forest below."

Chloe yawns, fidgets with her toy robin as though determinedly trying to keep herself awake.

"Are you tired, sweetheart?"

"No."

"Oh, that's your new favourite word at the moment, isn't it?" Ange teases.

"No," Chloe says firmly, adamant the way only toddlers can be, eyelids fluttering.

"Oh, okay, then. Shall we just read a couple more pages, see if you're ready to go to sleep then? Yeah? And then we can finish the story…" Ange trails off, realises with a sinking feeling that she won't be there tomorrow night, or the next, that she won't get to see Chloe after tomorrow for a long two weeks. "We can finish it tonight, or we can finish it another time, okay? We'll see. So, one day, as Baby Bird was eating her breakfast of long, wriggly worms, Mummy Bird had something to tell her. 'Baby Bird,' she said, 'you're old enough now to learn to fly. You can come with me today, and we'll fly over the lake to see my friend Peacock.'

"'But I don't know how to fly,' said Baby Bird, feeling very frightened.

"'You'll learn,' said Mummy Bird. 'It's easy. All you have to do is follow me, and flap your wings, and jump off the edge of the nest.' But Baby Bird wasn't so sure.

"'What if Killer Cat finds me?'" asked Baby Bird worriedly.

"'He won't,' said Mummy Bird. 'Killer Cats can't fly. As long as you follow me, everything will be fine.'

"But Baby Bird felt anxious as she stood on the edge of the nest behind Mummy Bird, and she could feel her heart beating very, very fast in her chest. And when Mummy Bird spread her wings and flew high into the sky, Baby Bird felt even more afraid. She wanted to flap her wings and fly after her, but when she looked over the edge of the nest, she realised it was a very long way down. Chloe? Chloe, are you still awake?"

"No."

Ange laughs. "No? I think it's bedtime, then, isn't it? Come on. Have you got your teddy? Are you going to shuffle over, then, or there won't be any space left for Mummy, when…"

"Mummy go Sadruh," says Chloe suddenly, catches her totally off-guard.

"Yes. Yes, Mummy's going to St Andrews tomorrow," Ange agrees quietly, hugs Chloe tightly to her chest. "But, I will be back in two weeks. Okay? You've got your chart, haven't you? You've got your chart in the kitchen that we showed you earlier, and you and Nana are going to colour a box in every day, and then when you've coloured in all the boxes, Mummy will come home for the weekend. And then Mummy will go to St Andrews again, and then you'll have another chart to colour in, and then Mummy will come home again. Yeah?"

"I come."

"Yes, and you and Nana are going to come to St Andrews to see Mummy," Ange covers. "Because Mummy's going to go and learn how to be a doctor in St Andrews, remember? We've talked about this, haven't we? And you're going to stay here with Nana."

"I come, Mummy."

"I know. I know, but I can't bring you with me, sweetheart. I wish I could. But I will come home to see you all the time, okay? All the time. And you and Nana will come and see me. And I will think about you every single day. Can I have a cuddle?"

"Mummy," says Chloe in agreement, shuffles round on Ange's lap, reaches to be lifted, wraps her arms around her mother's neck as she obliges. "Mummy, Mummy, Mummy, Mummy."

"Chloe, Chloe, Chloe, Chloe, Chloe. You are _so_sweet, aren't you? Hey? I love you so, so much," Ange tells her, rests her chin against the crown of Chloe's head, breathes in her scent.

She's not entirely sure which of them is going to find this harder, truth be told. She's been convinced that it's going to be Chloe up until now, spent months trying to prepare her for this- or as much as it was ever going to be possible to prepare an only-just two-year-old for her mother disappearing off to university a two-hour drive away, at least, given she's far too little to understand what any of it actually means until it's happened, until her mummy is gone and it's just her and her nana at home.

Now, however, now it's tomorrow, Ange wonders if she's going to find this harder than her baby after all.

Because she's still just a baby.

Maybe this is all a terrible mistake. Maybe she should never even have considered going to medical school this year after her rejection came through from Aberdeen, maybe she should have taken a year out to be with Chloe, reapplied…

Chloe is still only a baby. And she's about to turn her whole world upside down in the name of pursuing her own dreams, Ange reminds herself, she's being so selfish…

"Luh-vu." Chloe tries, doesn't quite manage it, but it's still enough to both warm her mother's heart and shatter it into tiny pieces.

She's going to miss her unbearably.

"I love you more, sweetheart. And you're so, so clever. I bet you're going to be talking like a big girl next time I see you, aren't you?"

"Luh-vu more," says Chloe sleepily, snuggles into Ange's chest, and she's too young to understand what she's saying, of course, merely parroting back, but still it might just be the most adorable thing she's ever done.

"Nope. Nope, Mummy definitely loves you more, Chloe. Definitely. Come on, then, sleepyhead. I've got to go and finish packing everything for medical school, okay?" She prises Chloe off of her gently, lowers her down, pulls the covers up over her. "Goodnight, sweetheart. I'll be here when you wake up."


	2. Chapter 2

**Teenage mum Ange and baby Chloe was just too much fun to write and your reviews were lovely, so I've written you a bonus scene. The next instalment of Baby Bird the bedtime story will be in the next chapter! **

**Feedback is always welcome, it really helps to know what you guys are thinking. You are also allowed to tell me what you don't like :) **

**This chapter was almost entirely fuelled by G and Ts (Clementine tonic water is LUSH), I apologise sincerely for any typos! **

**-IseultLaBelle x **

**St Andrews, August 1992**

"Oh my goodness, your baby sister's _so_cute, Ange," Michelle, her new neighbour along the corridor in her student halls exclaims. "What's her name?"

She's leading Chloe back through the hallways to her own room, dragging the suitcase she's just collected from her mum's car behind her in one hand, ring and little fingers of her other hand held in her little girl's tiny grip, still far too little to hold her hand properly.

And she's hoping, emphasis on the hoping part, that Chloe will answer for herself, or as best as she can manage, still in the adorable but ever-so-slightly haphazard stage of being totally floored by pronouncing her own name. Because she's going to have to manage on her own around strange adults in a few days, Ange reminds herself, once her mother is back at university herself and they're trialling two mornings of preschool a week.

But all Chloe does is shuffle behind her, leans against her leg shyly, thumb straight into her mouth.

"Oh, okay. We're trying to stop doing that, aren't we?" Ange tells her, bends, scoops her up, balances her against her waist, switches into mum mode on autopilot. "What's your name?"

Chloe just curls inwardly; small fingers play with Ange's hair as she buries her head in her chest.

"Sorry," Ange apologises. "Sorry, she's a bit shy. Until you get to know her, at least, then she never shuts up. This is Chloe."

"Hi, Chloe," Michelle tries brightly, looks back to Ange as Chloe only clings on tighter, shy, overwhelmed, Ange reasons, after all the excitement of two hours in the car and arriving in a strange place full of even stranger people, constant trips to and from the car moving everything in. "You're so lucky. I've got the one brother, two years younger than me. Two years is a horrible age gap, we're at each other's throat all the time."

Ange smiles for a moment, contemplates, buying time. "Well, she can be a little terror when she gets going."

She thinks about it. Just for a moment, she thinks about it, considers what the next year living on this corridor might be like if she goes along with her new flatmate's assumption, passes Chloe off as her little sister. Just for a moment.

But when it comes down to it, she just can't do it.

"Chloe," Ange shifts her gently, trying to prompt her. "Chloe, who am I?"

"Mummy," says Chloe, finally takes her thumb out of her mouth, uncurls herself, looks straight at her mother happily.

Perhaps it's taking the easy way out, cowardly, leaving to her two-year-old to explain for her.

It just never quite gets any easier, that first time going through it all.

More often than not, it's fine after that first time, with people her own age, at least. But that first time never gets any easier.

"Oh, she's yours?" There's an element of surprise in Michelle's voice now, though she's evidently trying so hard to conceal it. "Sorry, I didn't realise. How old are you?" she asks suddenly, then seems to think better of it. "Only if… sorry, you don't have to answer that, I didn't mean to…"

"No, no, it's alright. I'm nineteen," Ange tells her, can feel herself flushing a little now, always hates this part. "And Chloe turned two in May, didn't you, Chloe?"

She might as well just get it all over with now, she figures. She might as well get it out in the open, give Michelle the facts she needs to do the maths, work out how old she was when she became a mother- Chloe's mother, at least- let her tell the whole corridor, even the whole building, if that's what she wants. At least it'll be done then.

Michelle can judge her all she likes.

All of them can.

She wouldn't change Chloe for the world, no matter what, despite how she came into the world, despite how impossibly hard it's been at times.

Despite everything.

She cares more about Chloe than she'll ever care about fitting in with her new neighbours in the halls of residence, than being liked by her course mates.

In fact, she's absolutely certain that she cares more about Chloe than she'll ever care about anything else, ever again.

"She's two?" Michelle repeats. "Oh, she's tiny, isn't she? My cousin's baby just turned two, but I think he's about twice the size of her."

"She's probably not going to be tall," Ange agrees. She wraps her arms around Chloe tighter, protective, still a sensitive topic. "She's always been tiny. She's not… she's not staying here," she covers quickly, suddenly realising it might be best to clear this up now, before a rumour spreads around the building that they're all going to have to live alongside a clingy, temperamental toddler. "She's going back home with my mum tomorrow, she's going to look after her for me in term time. My mum's here, Chloe's not staying with me tonight, or anything, she's just gone to move her car."

"Oh, sure. Is Chloe's dad at uni too, then?"

"She doesn't have a dad," Ange says firmly.

She doesn't mean for it to come out quite as defensive, as hostile, as it does.

"Oh, sorry. I didn't mean… Well, she's gorgeous."

Ange smiles. "Thank you."

"It must be hard," Michelle offers. "Having to leave her, I mean."

"Yes, it's going to be… different. But I'm going to come home in the holidays, and I'll come and visit every few weeks, won't I?" Ange tries to engage her daughter. "We've talked about this, haven't we?"

"Tain," says Chloe shyly, peers up at Michelle from the safety of her mother's arms.

"That's right, and Nana's going to bring you to visit me on the train, isn't she? If I ever manage to peel you off me for long enough to unpack."

"I could take her," Michelle offers. "If you want, if that would help. I don't mind entertaining her for a bit."

"Oh… I think we're alright." Ange clutches Chloe tightly to her chest, knows she's being fiercely overprotective, given it's just a casual, friendly offer, one it's clear she can turn down without causing offence but she doesn't care.

That's the difference, she ponders absentmindedly.

That's the difference between Darren and Chloe.

With Darren, she was always more than happy to palm him off on the first person who even looked like they might be open to the idea, overwhelmed, far too young, desperate for all the breaks she could get.

Maybe it's how she had Chloe. Maybe it's everything she went through with Chloe before she was even born, everything that came after. Maybe it's because of everything that happened with her first baby, in a strange sort of way; maybe this is just maternal instinct kicking in on overdrive to make up for how badly it let her down last time around, something inexplicable, all-powerful, that she's simply never going to be able to be as relaxed with Chloe as she was with Darren, won't ever quite feel comfortable letting her out of her sight, even when she's leaving her with people she trusts completely.

Christ, what is she even doing here? Why did she ever think this was a good idea, why didn't she just take a gap year, find a part-time job in Aberdeen, give herself an extra year or two with Chloe…

"Thank you, though," Ange covers quickly, suddenly aware that her sharp, instant dismissal might have come across a little rude. "Maybe next time? She's… I'm a bit nervous about leaving her," she admits. "Not with you, I'm sure she'd be fine with you, I mean leaving her with my mum long-term…"

It's ridiculous, really, to think that Michelle- or anyone, even, anyone else in halls of residence, at least- is going to understand.

Her life is worlds away from theirs.

They're all more or less the same age, yes, but the rest of them have never known responsibility even remotely comparable to being a single mother to a two-year-old. Their biggest worries besides their grades over the next year are going to be where they're getting wasted tonight, where the best deal on vodka is this week and whether they'll have enough money left to live on something other than cold baked beans and iron bru on Sundays when the canteen is closed come the final weeks of term, while hers are going to be if Chloe is happy and settled without her, if she's eating, if she's finally growing and gaining weight like she should be, if she's found her favourite toy rabbit she's mislaid somewhere around the house and won't go to sleep without…

"Mummy suh-dih do-da," offers Chloe, glances up at Michelle curiously, shyness beginning to fade.

"Yes, Mummy's studying to become a doctor," Ange translates, smiles apologetically at Michelle.

Although, she considers, at least her new… is it too early to say friend?... will appreciate that at least part of her anxiety over leaving Chloe in someone else's care is that nobody but her, not even her own mum, at times, Chloe's nana, can make any sense whatsoever of Chloe's awful speech.

God, how on earth is Chloe going to cope with preschool, even in two lots of three and a half hours a week? Because that's the trouble, at twenty-seven months she's reached the stage at which she's very clear on what she does and doesn't want, happily babbles away, but her speech is so terrible for her age that understanding her seems to be near impossible for anyone else…

All of a sudden, Ange feels rather sick.

"Is she?" Michelle asks Chloe, puts on her best talking to children voice. "Wow. And are you helping Mummy move in?"

Chloe nods. "And Tecka."

"Yep, and then we're going to Tesco, aren't we, because Mummy forgot to pack the towels."

"Mummy, sheh."

"Oh, okay, you want to show Michelle your shells you found on the beach? It's why I'm so late moving in," Ange explains, grips onto Chloe with one arm haphazardly, rummages in the pocket of her jeans with her free hand, places the assortment of shells into Chloe's small hands. "She slept the whole car journey and then she was totally hyper by the time we arrived, I had to try and wear her out a bit before we could do anything else."

"Oh, wow, they're pretty, aren't they, Chloe?" Michelle tries.

"Sheh."

"Yes, they're shells, that's right. We're still working on your Ls, aren't we? Those are really, really tricky." Ange smiles gratefully, hopes Michelle will get the message, realise that she's trying to thank her for making an effort with her daughter when she'd probably much rather be hanging out with any one of the other new arrivals that doesn't come with a two-year-old as an add-on. "It's a bit unfortunate, really, given mean Mummy gave her the worst possible name. Chloe, what's your name?"

Chloe frowns in concentration, busy examining her seashells. "Ko-ee."

"Oh my goodness, she's adorable. Chloe, can you say Michelle?"

"Me-sheh."

"Do you know what, I think that's going to be my new nickname. You're so clever, aren't you?"

"Me-sheh," says Chloe, holds out one of her seashells in her small hand. "Me-sheh, yeh-yuh."

"Oh, can I see? Thank you. It's…" Michelle glances across to Ange for assistance.

"It's yellow, isn't it?" Ange helps her out. "Good girl. And you've got a pink one, and a white one…"

"Me-sheh's."

"Oh, you're giving it to Michelle, are you? She might not want it, sweetheart…" Ange warns.

"No, no, it's okay. Thank you, Chloe, it's beautiful."

Ange smiles gratefully. "Anyway, we'll leave you in peace. Chloe, are you going to say bye to Michelle?"

"Bye Me-sheh-luh."

"Bye, Chloe. Thank you for my beautiful shell. Listen, it was great to meet you," Michelle tells Ange. "I don't know if you'll be busy with her tonight, but some of us are going to go out for drinks, if you want to come. I mean, it'll probably be well past her bedtime."

"Oh, I… thank you. Maybe. I'm not sure yet," Ange confesses. "She's staying tonight, but in a hotel with my mum, I just don't know if…"

"No worries. Let me know later, yeah? I'll be around. But no pressure. They'll be plenty of other times, won't there."

"Thank you." She's not just thanking her for being so understanding in that particular moment, hopes Michelle knows that. "I'll see you later. Come on then, Chloe." She sets her daughter down, waits for her to hold onto her fingers. "You're going to walk like a big girl for me, please. I can't bring the suitcase and carry you, can I?"

"Mummy," says Chloe, adamantly, the tone she always uses when she wants one of two things, as she walks along beside her obediently. "Mummy, Mummy…"

"Okay. Okay, we'll take the suitcase into my room, and then we'll go and sort you out, alright? Please don't want what I think you want," Ange murmurs under her breath, not when she's tried so hard to wean Chloe off wanting to comfort feed over the summer.

That said, she's willing to bet the halls of residence toilets don't have a baby changing table.

"Mummy," Chloe protests.

"Yes, I know, sweetheart. I know, we just need to find our way back to my room, don't we? In a minute, okay? You're going to have to be really patient for me."

"Mummy, no."

"Chloe, yes. I promise, we will deal it in a minute, okay? Look. Look, here we go, this is my room. Keep holding my hand, please. See, we're nearly there, Mummy's just got to unlock the door," Ange chats to her mindlessly, because already she's conscious of the huddle of students outside the next door down staring at her and Chloe, and she's desperate to avoid a full-on temper tantrum in front of them, especially when she hasn't met them yet, when it's the very first day. "Am I making a huge mistake, Chloe?" she sighs, finally gets the door open, pushes her in over the threshold, dumps the suitcase, bends down, heart sinking as Chloe throws herself into her arms, pulls at the neckline of her t shirt, clingy. "Oh, okay. Okay, that's what you want. I'm not going to be here after today though, alright? We've talked about this, remember? You're going to have to make do with Nana and the soya stuff out of a bottle. Am I getting it all wrong, moving to medical school?"

"You li Sadruh, Mummy," Chloe offers in response as her mother carries her across the room, sits down on the edge of the bed.

"Yes," Ange agrees. "Yes, I'm going to live in St Andrews. But just for a few months at a time. And then I'll come home and see you, okay, sweetheart? I promise."

"I come," says Chloe, shuffles in her arms. "I come, Mummy."

It's in that moment that Ange realises that while Chloe might be parroting back, saying all the right things on the surface, the reality is very, very different.

In reality, her poor baby girl has absolutely no clue what is about to hit her in just a few hours' time.


End file.
